Rough Start, Strong End

Tried to think about how to summarize this week, and rough start, strong end is just about perfect.  I had a very rough week.  I'm not usually much of a crier, or, at least I try not to be, but this week I did my fair share.  It started off with a really hard start to the week in school.  I have two classes that are just driving me crazy lately.  So, after those bad days at work all I wanted to do was pick up Kenley and come home and try to enjoy a few hours with her and Ray.  Kenley wanted nothing to do with me Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday night.  She cried and tried to get away from me the second she would see me. Talk about breaking a mom's heart :(  I already have total working-mom guilt, and this only confirmed my fears that she would not want her mommy because I am spending so much time away from her.  I know that this is completely normal for kids to go through, and I shouldn't take it personally.  But, as much as I tried to tell myself that I couldn't help buy feel horrible.  So, by the third night, I basically had a break down. I was getting anxious about the weekend, since we already had plans for my parents to watch Kenley so we could go out to celebrate Greg's birthday.  I always feel so conflicted because I do like to go out sometimes, but it IS hard for me to be away from Kenley on the weekends because that is what I look forward to all week. I think it is kind of hard for me to explain, but sometimes I just get worked up anticipating being away from her even if it is just for a few hours.

But, anyway, the end of the week was better.  Thursday and Friday went much smoother at school.  I forced my one class that had been giving me hell to do silent work until the end of the week.  Two of my favorite students from another class even wrote me the sweetest letter telling me that I was their favorite teacher.  It was much better picking Kenley up those days, and we were able to spend some time together both nights. Kenley was so snuggly to me on Thursday and Saturday, that I swear, she was trying to make up for the rough nights before. Friday night we went to dinner with Joan, and it was so nice being able to catch up and have some girl talk. Saturday, we went out for my sister's graduation from her Master's Degree Program and my dad's birthday.  Later,  that night, my parents watched Kenley so that we could go bowling with Katie and Greg to celebrate Greg's birthday.  I was really glad that we went and we had a fun time.  

I am determined to have a good week this week!  I only have 2 days of work until I start my 2 week Christmas break!  I can not wait to just be home and spend every minute with my little girl.  I know Christmas is going to be so much fun with her this year.  I am happy that Ray will also have a 3 day weekend for Christmas and New Years.  I am going to focus on my family and getting in the spirit of Christmas!